Me and you against the world.

Zane vs. AT&T

Welcome to AT&T. My name is Sharon. How may I help you today?

you: hi how much is it for the elite dsl + cable tv?

Sharon: I will be happy to answer your questions regarding AT&T services. I specialize in setting up new phone accounts and High Speed Internet service.

you: im not interested in a phone line...just elite dsl and i am considering cable tv as well

Sharon: First, Let me thank you for considering AT&T as your service provider.

you: yr welcome

Sharon: For TV, are you referring to DirecTV?

you: sure
you: how much is that?
you: the elite internet is $35 a month
you: how much more is tv?

Sharon: TV will cost you around $29.99.
Sharon: It is a pre-requisite to have basic telephone service from AT&T to qualify for TV service.
Sharon: Do you currently have local service with AT&T?

you: no
you: so i would need phone to get tv?
you: do i need phone to get internet?

Sharon: Yes, you are correct.
Sharon: The Basic home phone line would cost you around $7 - $8 per month.
you: do i need phone to get internet?
Sharon: Yes, you need to get the phone to get the DirecT service.
Sharon: DirecTV*

you: so i need a phone to get anything at all
you: i dont want a phone i just want internet

Sharon: For getting internet you need not to have the phone service.
you: sweet solo internet it is!
Sharon: Yes, you are correct.

you: are there any first time customer deals on getting the whole package?

Sharon: I am sorry but at this point of time there are no such package.

you: :(
you: ill be your best friend

Sharon: Thank you for the co-operation.
Sharon: Thank you for being my friend.
Sharon: I apologize for the difficulties you are experiencing, your patience and efforts are appreciated.
Sharon: Is there anything else I can assist you with today?
Sharon: We have not heard from you in a while. Do you wish to continue this chat?

you: yes
you: one sec

Sharon: Sure! please let me know whenever you need my assistance.

you: so if i get direct tv...that is through the phone line..or digital right?
you: no satelite involved?

Sharon: It is through satellite.
Sharon: It is a pre-requisite to have basic telephone service from AT&T to qualify for TV service.

you: so you all would have to come and set up a satalite dish on my house?
you: shoot me straight here
you: no games
you: just honest truth

Sharon: Yes, you are correct but if you order online, you will get free professional installation.

you: free eh
you: i thought i just read that it is a $200 installation process to have someone do it.
you: and what are the other sneaky trick you guys have...
you: "hidden fees" and the like
you: Sharon i like you... and i trust you wont let me down here
you: real talk

Sharon: If you order online then there is no charge for the professional installation.

you: ok ok so i order this bundle...for $100 a month
you: i get elite DSL, direcTV, and a phone...and they come and set the whole thing up?
you: do i have to pay for anything else

Sharon: Yes, other then the monthly payment you need to pay the taxes.
Sharon: Taxes & Surcharges vary by locality according to state and local laws

you: uncle sam has to get his huh

Sharon: A fair estimate is to say your bill may increase by approximately $10.
you: that is a fair estimate
Sharon: Yes, you are correct.
Sharon: However, due to the complex nature of taxes, fees, and surcharges that vary by state and local laws according to services selected, a billing specialist will be able to calculate a more precise figure.

you: so if i sign up for this ... you guys supply the cable box, the wireless router, and a phone?
you: or do i need to go and buy all them shits my self
you: ???

Sharon: Yes, we offer the equipment.

you: for free?
you: remember ... real talk

Sharon: The price of Modem is $49.99 or Gateway is $79.99.

you: ha! HIDDEN FEES
you: now since we are besties can you wave those costs for me?
you: Sharon?

Sharon: Please feel rest assured there are no hidden fees.
Sharon: The modem is $49.99 with a mail in rebate of $49.99 and Gateway is $79.99 with a mail in rebate $79.99 with Pro or Elite (If available). High Speed Internet plans having AT&T phone service or if you place an online order for High Speed Internet along with AT&T phone services.

you: oh snap! you got me again
you: you are far too good at this
you: so where do you live?
you: what package do you have at your place?

Sharon: I am sorry but at this point of time it is not permissible to disclose this information.

you: i just want to see if you like the package that you have.
you: and find out which one it is
you: see i dont really know anyone with att service and i want to talk to someone i can trust about it
you: and i feel like we have a pretty solid relationship right now...and i was hoping that as a friend you could sort me out

Sharon: I certainly understand your concern but I would suggest you to order basic home phone service and internet and once the phone service is activated you can order the DirecTV.
Sharon: AT&T Basic phone service (Measure rate plan) would cost you around $6 a month.

you: is that cheaper than getting one of these "bundle packages"
you: we are in a recession you know and im all about pinching those pennies

Sharon: I certainly understand your concern but this is the most basic package for the phone service.
Sharon: If you order online today with me you will receive the New Line Promotional credit making your phone installation free of charge.

you: ok
you: so the cheapest way to do this...since i dont really want or need a phone is to get the phone and DSL package and then sort out the TV in like a week or so?

Sharon: For phone it will cost you around $6 a month.
Sharon: The price of High Speed Internet (If available) plans having AT&T phone service or placing an online order along with AT&T phone services are: Basic is $14.99, Express is $25.00, Pro is $30.00 and Elite is $35.00.
Sharon: Once you order the phone service and it is activated then you can order triple package of DirecTV.

you: and then direct tv?

Sharon: It will cost you around $99.99 for all the three service.
you: but here is the question...if i am not going to be using the phone...at all...and i will be using the elite internet and cable that is $6+$35+$30 +taxes= $71 plus taxes...and that is way cheaper than the bundle...
Sharon: In this case, you can surely order the services and then call the customer care service to bundle it.

you: wait tho
you: tell me im right
you: $71 plus taxes is cheaper than $100 plus taxes

Sharon: Yes, you are absolutely correct.

you: so i am right that doing these separatly is cheaper than doing them in a bundle
you: (because i dont need any of the phone services other than the fact that i need it)

Sharon: Yes, you can order it separately and then bundle it.

you: there you are with this bundling business...
you: what gives

Sharon: Yes, once you order the service then you can call the AT&T customer care service to bundle the service.
Sharon: Would you like me to send you a link to begin your order today?

you: what is the bundling...cuz to me it just sounds like it is going to cost me way more money

Sharon: Please feel rest assured you will not be charged anything extra to bundle the service.
Sharon: Is there anything else I can assist you with today?

you: i would like a hug

Sharon: Okay! I Is there anything else I can help you with right now?

you: how about that sweet buddy deal on tv phone and internet...i mean we just hugged
you: that was intense

Sharon: I certainly understand your concern but at this point of time I would suggest you to just order the basic home phone service.

-Sharon...you are good...maybe even too good...